Know How I Know You're An Idiot?

I'll tell ya...it's when you do the same exact thing twice.

I rolled into our family doctor's office yesterday afternoon to pick up a prescription for Jason. It's a monthly 'script thing, so you'd suppose the office staff would have this scenario down pat, yeah? Ummm, not so much.

I told the office assistant that I was there to pick up my husband's prescription, gave her his name and handed her my ID so she'd know I was all, you know - authorized and shizz. She ticky-typed something on the computer and said "Oh, there's nothing in the computer about a prescription being ready for him!" All cheery and whatnot. "If he'd gotten a call that his prescription was ready, it would be documented!"

"Well," I explained, "Last month when I came to pick up the prescription, the same thing happened, and it turned out that the paperwork had been misfiled. Would you mind checking with Dr. G's assistant?" She looked puzzled for a minute and then asked, "Is this a paper prescription?"

Why no...I came in for the HOLOGRAPHIC prescription, of course. What the hell...? Why is this doctor's office so backwards? Why do I have to pick up the prescription in person anyway? I mean, the office is practically on the Intel campus, right in the heart of the Silicon Forest - can't the damn thing be e-mailed to the pharmacy?

So she toddles along down the hall, says something to one of the chicks in scrubs and then proceeds to have a three minute conversation with another employee. About a minute into the convo, the scrub-clad chick handed the dippy office assistant a piece of paper. For the remaining two minutes of her conversation, I seethed quietly on the other side of the desk. And I knew - I just KNEW that the piece of paper she held was for me. And of course it was. She handed the sheet of paper to me with a happy-scrappy little "Thanks for your patience!" - I simply managed a wry smile and got the ruff out of there.

Jason reported this evening that he'd gotten a call from Dr. G's office today that his prescription was ready. I just smirked and said "Oh, I bet you they got that call documented..."

Ugghh...a flashback.

Yesterday, I saw the flyer below hanging in the library and it brought back some unwelcome memories:

Back in high school, I was deep in denial about needing to start sporting some spectacles. As senior year rolled along, I noticed that the board in the front of the classroom was harder and harder to see (and if you know me at all, you know I was one of those chicks that sat in the back of the classroom - hellsno was I going to move closer to the teacher!). I finally submitted to a contact lens fitting around Christmas, but hoo boy - it was tough going. The eye doc insisted upon trying to place the contacts in my eyes himself. And the thing is...my eye thing is just a teeny bit less pathological than my ear thing (thankyouverymuch Star Trek 2, Wrath of Khan). So yeah, the fitting didn't go well. And so the contacts stayed in their case...

Until one lovely spring afternoon, that is. It was a weekday afternoon, and I was at Heron Lakes Golf Course, practicing with my teammates on the Benson High women's golf team (don't get excited - I still suu-huck at golf). After a nice round o' 9, I headed back to the parking lot and after loading my clubs into the back of Mom's sweet minivan, I saw the cutest little bunny over in the grass. I headed towards it, cooing "here, bunny bunny, c'mere!" When my boyfriend yelled out to me "Stop, Aisha - that's not a bunny! It's a RAT!"

Ewwwww! It turned out that it wasn't a rat - it was in fact, a nutria. But it didn't matter. I figured out the contacts immediately.

I've been selected!

According to an e-mail that recently dropped into my inbox, one of the photos I posted to my flickr account was talent-scouted by an outfit called Schmap. I took the pic in question during my trip to Boise last October. The photo is of the vine-covered roof of a gazebo on the grounds of the Sawtooth Winery outside of Boise. And now this chick right here has got her photo published in the Schmap Boise Guide! So that's kinda cool. You can see the pic here.

I am soooo white.

I read this on my new favorite blog. Seriously? People didn't know about Oscar parties?

Ok, that's it - I'm moving to Canada.

Almost forgot...

Jon Stewart had the best line of the night regarding Norbit's nomination for Achievement in Makeup...

"Too often the Academy ignores movies that aren't good."

Awesome.

Final Tally

As the girls and I sat down to do our official guesstimatin' on the Oscar prizes, I made a few switches to my picks, resulting in...drumroll, please...correct picks on all the BIG SIX categories! Unfortunately, some of my rearranging within the top 19 categories (minus those doc/short/foreign groups - who watches all of those?) went sideways, so I ended up with a disappointing 10 on my picks.

My ballot - including editorial comments

Dana and Sharon dig into the pre-voting deliciousness

Jackie was the big winner of the night for correct predictions - and for that she won a Jolly Time!

Picks and Predicts...

It's time for Oscar!

The red carpet coverage begins in 30 minutes and I am ready! The girls will be here soon, the red wine's decantin' and the ballots are ready for fillin' out! Without further ado, here are my Oscar predictions on the Big 6 categories:

Best Actor - Daniel Day-Lewis
Best Actress - Marion Cotillard
Best Supp Actor - Javier Bardem
Best Supp Actress - Cate Blanchett
Best Director - Coen Brothers
Best Film - No Country for Old Men

And these are my personal faves in each category, just in case you were wondering...

Best Actor - Daniel Day-Lewis
Best Actress - Julie Christie
Best Supp Actor - Javier Bardem (but I freakin' LOVED Philip Seymour Hoffman in CWW)
Best Supp Actress - Amy Ryan
Best Director - Paul Thomas Anderson
Best Film - Juno

Oscar Status Check

'Kay - it's approximately 28 hours until the Oscars telecast and here's where I'm at...

According to the master movie list alongside this here blog, I've not yet seen the following movies:

4 Months, 3 Weeks And 2 Days
Assassination of Jesse James by the Coward Robert Ford
Bee Movie
I'm Not There
Into the Wild
Persepolis
The Brave One
The Diving Bell and the Butterfly
The Great Debaters
The Kite Runner
Walk Hard

Let's see if we can cull this list down, shall we?

4 Months - Based on my detailed research, this show's only viewable at the Portland International Film Festival - and I'm not gonna deal with all that.

Jesse James - According to others, this was a painful 3-hour watch. And there's zero chance Casey Affleck's getting the Best Supp Actor win over Javier Bardem, so it's getting skipped.

Bee Movie - Golden Globe nominee that never received an Oscar nod. Pass.

I'm Not There - Bob Dylan gives me the heebie jeebies. Pass.

Into the Wild - Sharon and I are seeing this tonight!

Persepolis - Sharon and I are also seeing this tonight!

The Brave One - Also a Golden Globe nominee that never received an Oscar nod. Pass.

The Diving Bell and the Butterfly - I totally prefer the French title for this flick: "Le Scaphandre et le Papillon". I plan to work the word "scaphandre" into future conversations as much as possible. Oh, and the Portland-Based Girl Gang and I are seeing it this afternoon!

The Great Debaters - Ughhh...another Denzel playing Denzel flick? Pass.

The Kite Runner - Only up for Original Score. Pass.

Walk Hard - Missed it when it was showing at the McMenamins theater pubs, and I wasn't gonna see it without a pint of Hammerhead. Waitin' on video.

Check back tomorrow for my official Oscar picks!

The Importance of a Locked Door

Soon after arriving at Crystal Crane on Saturday afternoon, I whipped up some sandwiches to satisfy our grumbly bellies. I'd set up a couple of totes in front of the window and got to work. At one point, I heard Kedz let out a low growl and I looked up and out the window. A guy in a robe was heading down the sidewalk and made the turn up the walkway to our cabin. I quickly reached over and locked the door, then backed away from the window. The doorknob rattled, Kedz started barking in earnest, and I peered out the other window to see the guy walk away and head into the cabin just beyond ours.

WTF? I know the cabins look alike, but as you'll note in the photo of our cabin, there is a giant freakin' letter "C" right next to the door! And PS - if you were located in one of the middle cabins, I could see mixing 'em up, but this guy was in the last cabin! Even while on autopilot, you oughta be able to navigate to the end of the sidewalk and hit your own cabin.

Anyway, that wasn't the last of it...on Sunday morning around 6 am, I bundled up to make the trip to the restroom (14 degrees!), then ran back and dove under the covers. I couldn't fall back asleep, so I grabbed my book to do a little light reading as Jason snoozed away. Kedzie again started growling, and as I looked at him with deep curiosity, THE DOOR OPENED AND THAT SAME FREAKIN' GUY STARTED TO WALK IN! With his crazed barking, Kedzie scared him off, and I heard the guy yell out "Sorry! Sorry! I'm so sorry!" as he made his way to the correct cabin. I bailed out of bed to lock the door and turned to see Jason, now awake and fully confused, asking "What just happened?"

Nevermind, sweetie...it was just the dog.
[Aisha turns to double-check the lock, vowing to always, always make sure the door is locked in future.]

(Mis)Adventures in Hot Springin'

My dad was the original hot springs freak. When Faith and I were little, our parents would drag us all around the Northwest on the hunt for the perfect hot springs. It's an elusive beast, the perfect hot springs - and a few casualties were suffered over the years. I'm not sure if we'll ever know the full extent of the psychic scarring Faith and I received as a result of seeing so many naked hippies at a young age.

And unfortunately, the scars aren't all psychological. I'm too young to remember properly, but during one trip to Austin Hot Springs outside of Estacada, I got burned. I was about three, and my chubby lil' baby foot (encased in "weird boots" according to my mother) got stuck between some rocks over a hot vent. I recall having a scar that covered about a third of the top of my foot during childhood, but over the years the scar has receded to the size of a quarter. All I know is that if this kinda thing happened today, the 'rents would likely be busted for child neglect or something. But given it was the late 1970s, but I'm pretty sure they simply took me home and slathered my foot in butter. Wasn't that the 1970s miracle salve for burns?

During the middle and high school years, Faith and I would head to California to stay with Dad over the summer. And every summer, without fail, we'd sojourn across the desert Southwest on our annual road trip. In addition to hiking around Indian village ruins and collecting turquoise and Hopi pottery, Dad continued to search for hot springs. Neither Faith nor I could understand the appeal of driving through 100 degree weather to sit in 100 degree hot springs, but Dad loved it. I remember one particularly gorgeous hot spring in New Mexico. We hiked for a while up to a beautiful pool with crystal clear water. There were big boulders and downed trees and I recall that it smelled all wonderful and desert-y. Happy times.

Fifteen years later, the hunt for hot springs in Harney County didn't start off so promising. We headed down the gravel road along the east side of the Steens in search of Alvord Hot Springs on Sunday morning and arrived to find a car already there. No big deal, I said as we got out of the car. I could see a single guy sitting in the springs, and as I let the dog out of the car, he skittered out across the deck from the water to his cooler to grab a beer. Okay, I thought, another nekkid hippie. I can deal with that. I ain't skerred. But in the short time it took to take Kedz on a potty walk, he'd darted across the deck for another beer. And it was a short time, I'm telling you.

Alvord Desert

Alvord Hot Springs (Photo by Matt Goff)

Jason was not impressed. Not about the nekkid hippie getting loaded - it was more the combination of nekkid hippie getting loaded all on his lonesome in the hot springs on a cold, cold day - and with no restroom facilities nearby. Ewwww. So we skipped it.

Later in the day however, we managed to find a lovely spot. It was a large hot pool in the middle of an island, in the middle of the Malheur River. Gorgeous! Getting there was a bit tricky given how muddy the road was in spots, but the Vue managed just fine. We forded the crossing to the island, and joined a few couples already enjoying the water. It was about 35 degrees that afternoon, but the water was delightful. We soaked in the hot springs, climbed out when we got too hot and watched the deer have their dinners along the rimrock above the river. Even Kedzie managed to control his antisocial dingo dog tendencies to come out and play.

Checkin' the road to the springs

Rimrock above the Malheur River

The girls got a little wild at the hot springs

Kedz shakes off after a dip in the chilly Malheur

Wild Animals

During our drive around the Steens, Jason did all the wildlife spottin'...as I was completely worthless. Every time I thought I saw something - and I mean every single time - the "animal" turned out to be a rock. So much for that 20/15 Lasik-enhanced vision, huh?

And it got to be goldarn-freakin-ridiculous. Whenever the car slowed down, I knew he'd found something new to ogle. So frustrating! All I was doing was sitting there, gazing out into the fields and hills, and I was completely oblivious to the lifeforms around me (clearly I'd suu-huck at any type of hunting endeavour). Jason was tasked with the role of transporting us without driving off the road into rocks, and he was STILL able to find the wild animals.

We saw all kinds o' birds, deer and bighorn sheep. Once we'd rounded the south end of the Steens towards the Malheur National Wildlife Refuge, we came upon a collection of deer and geese. I was awfully excited - I'd never seen a real live deer with antlers before. I've seen plenty of girl deer in my day, but never any boy deer...and there were three boys right in front of us! On another part of the drive, Jason pointed out a few deer, and as we sat watching them, more and more began to stand up - there were probably 50 or 60 of 'em all together.

Sheepsies

At the Malheur Wildlife Refuge

Da deer and da geese

Hangin' out in the rocks

Not exactly wildlife, but a nice example of the "open range" system, as the cow was on our side o' the fence...

My lone contribution...dead wildlife..

It's like a whole 'nother language...

Saw this flyer hanging in the Kitchen Cabin at Crystal Crane...




What does it all mean? I'm ever so confused. What is this "hands" business? Why would you measure a horse with hands? Haven't these people ever heard of a tape measure?

Crystal Crane Hot Springs

I chose Crystal Crane Hot Springs as our base of operations for the great Harney County Exploration of 2008. Initially, Jason and I wanted to test out the true 4-seasonability of our sweet new tent. But when I found out that it was getting into the single digits at night out in Southeast Oregon, I said to myself "Self...don't be a hero. That tent may be just fine for snowy mountaintops, but your sleeping bag is only rated to +30 degrees."

The hills near Crane

So after a quick Google search for "Burns lodging", I found Crystal Crane. It looked like a perfect middle ground - not a cheesy motel, but not camping on the frozen tundra. And certainly not one of those B&Bs where you have to be entirely too nice to strangers over breakfast in the morning. We had our own little cabin and access to a shared "Kitchen Cabin" where we could store our perishables in the fridge and cook our meals. Of course as jaded city dwellers, we elected to keep our foodstuffs in the cooler in our cabin - right where we could keep an eye on it.

Our adorable lil' cabin

Our digs

Several interesting things went down at Crystal Crane. First of all, it's a hot springs joint - so you'd expect the springs to be hot, right? Yeah, not so much. Apparently, a pump recently broke, so the large pond (normally around 100 degrees) was between 80 and 87 degrees while we were there. With an outdoor air temp of 20 - 30 degrees, it was gonna take a LOT warmer water to entice me. Fortunately, we were comp'd a soak in one of the private tubs in the bath house to make up for it.

The Bath House

For the first ten minutes, the soak was quite lovely, but when we went to add hot water to the tub nothing happened. I turned the faucet knob, and not a drop came out. We toughed it out as long as we could, but given the frigid air coming through the window, it wasn't long before we bailed out and headed for the showers. When I mentioned the apparent plumbing issue to staff, I was informed that I just needed to turn on the faucet using the knob in the floor. What? There wasn't a knob in the floor! Oh, she replied - wasn't the little trapdoor in the floor pulled up to reveal the water faucet? Uhhh...no. And am I alone in thinking that obscuring something as freaking critical as the faucet knob under the everlovin' floorboards may not be the best idea?!? Well, actually - that's almost as good as installing an UTTERLY USELESS knob on the wall. Jeez Louise.

But honestly, even if I sound as if we were really put out - we weren't. Despite the lack of actual hot springs, Crystal Crane was quite nice. One of the owners even helped us plan out an entire day of explorations and made sure to tell us which sights were not to be missed. This owner also let it slip that she and her husband were originally from the Seattle area, and had made several trips to the desert before relocating to Crane a few years ago. She told me that they were falconers, and that they had to come to the wide open country to fly their falcons.

Hoo Boy! You would not believe how fast I went running back to the cabin to tell Jason that I'd just met a real life FALCONER - just like the one on Saturday Night Live!!! This bit of news cracked us up for the rest of the weekend. All we had to do was start surmising how one would go about the business of falconry - just where exactly do you keep these birds when they're not falconin' around the desert? Are they kept in extremely large cages? Do falconers have a closet dedicated exclusively to the storage of their protective leather gloves? For Halloween, do falconers sport wee hats like their birds wear just prior to liftoff? Our questions were endless.

That's all for now. I'll leave you with a few pictures of the Willits Family enjoying a desert sunset. But stay tuned - the next few days will almost certainly feature the story of why Aisha will forevermore check and doublecheck that doors are locked...

Voodoo Donuts = Delicious!

After work on Friday, I met my new planner-type pals Joe and Mike at Capt. Ankeny's for happy hour. We enjoyed a few pints and racked up some karma points for rescuing a wee abandoned cell phone underneath a nearby table. We dialed the last number to have called the phone, which turned out to be the phone owner's son and he came to collect the cellie directly!

At the conclusion of our outing, Joe and I headed towards the nearest MAX station, only to become intoxicated by the scent of Voodoo Donuts fresh from the oven. I enjoyed a delightful selection - the Triple Chocolate Penetration - a devil's food cake donut with chocolate icing and Cocoa Puff cereal on top. Remember how I said I wasn't a huge, huge fan of chocolate? I'm kinda rethinking that now...

Ohhh...yum!

Joe rips into his Voodoo donut

Back from the Badlands

We arrived home safely this evening from Southeastern Oregon. Our 7-hour trip to Crane, Oregon was shaved down to 5 1/2 hours on the way back. Still felt a bit like forever, tho. We had a great time and I'll post pics and a trip report in the next few days...

V Day...schmee day

I was accused of being one of the most unromantic people in the world today. This post won't be a long rant of outrage at having been accused of such a heinous thing. On the contrary, I embrace my unromanticism. Flowers don't impress me much (and they get eaten by my gatos at home anyway), I don't brake for chocolate, and I hate the crowds of people that congregate at various eateries around town every February 14th evening.

One of the things I love about my man is the fact that he respects my feelings on this topic. It may strike the average girly as odd, but the first gift he gave me was five weeks into our courtship on the occasion of my 22nd birthday. I excitedly unwrapped a large-ish rectangular box to find...a tabletop BBQ grill! I was thrilled, and we enjoyed grilled deliciousness all summer long.

So anyway, today's Valentine's Day. The guy in the coffeeshop downstairs inquired as to how I'd be celebrating the day. I told him I'd rented a cabin out in Harney County for the weekend (though truth be told, the decision was more about taking advantage of a three-day weekend than V Day). He looked at me blankly and asked "Why would you go there?" I must point out that this is the same response I've gotten from just about everyone with whom I've shared my plans. Is there some deep, dark secret about Harney County? Are there vicious clown families roaming the countryside? I've seen pictures, dagnabbit - it looks gorgeous in a desert-y sort of way. So why are people acting as though I've informed them I'm vacationing in the fourth ring of hell?!?

CoffeeGuy then asked what Jason got me for V Day. I told him I'd received a set of silk long underwear and a Buck knife. C'mon now - what's more romantic than a man providing his lady with moisture-wicking base layers to ensure her comfort in 20-degree Harney County weather? And that's when CoffeeGuy pronounced me hopeless. Whatevs is what I say. You can keep your roses and candy, my man knows the way to my heart is through the door of the local REI.

You've gotta be kidding me...

Today I received a rebate check from Office Depot for the TomTom navigation I bought Jason for Christmas. I feel it is my duty to inform you, dear readers, that I made certain to fill out the rebate form in my best architectural drafting block script, practiced incessantly during my college years. It's important to note this because then you - like me - will be just as baffled to know that the rebate check came addressed to ARQTA WILLITS.

Are you kidding me? Arqta? ARQTA?!?! How am I supposed to cash this check?!?!

Living Room Theaters

On Friday evening, Sharon and I met Dana downtown at Living Room Theaters to catch Before the Devil Knows You're Dead. None of us had been to that particular venue before, and I think we were all suitably impressed. The menu was pretty limited, but the selections were tasty. Dana attested that the place was pretty empty when she first arrived at 5:30, but it was hoppin' by the time we finished dinner and left to claim our seats in the theater. We got a bottle of wine with dinner and took it with us when we headed into the movie. I have to admit, though the seats were awfully comfy, I missed the ottomans that I enjoy so much at Cinetopia. Ottomans could have definitely improved the experience. Oh yeah, and we experienced something that hasn't happened to me during movies IN YEARS...in the "Oh no she didn't!" category - some chick's cell phone rang during the flick! Can you believe it?! Did you really miss the numerous reminders on the screen before the show started? Really?

Snapped a few pics of the joint during our outing, including this one of the women's restroom sink. Is it weird to take a pic of a public handwashing station? Maybe. Is it particularly Aisha-esque? DEFINITELY...

What's really crazy is that between the mirrors are glass insets that allow you to see guys washing their hands in their own sink on the side of the wall. I initially looked up, saw a dude looking at me and turned around, thinking somebody had taken a left when they should have taken a right...so bizarre...

The bar at Living Room Theaters

Wine in the theater? Awesome!

What the...?

I don't understand. I mean...I really don't get it. I don't disagree with remakes of movies, but shouldn't there be a 10-, 20- or 30-year separation between them? I'm speaking of course of the announcement that Edward Norton will be playing Dr. Bruce Banner in The Incredible Hulk. Didn't we just have a Hulk movie?!? Turns out that was actually five years ago (I know, I can't believe it either!) But seriously...why do we need to see this movie again? I'll grant you that Ed Norton is a fantastic actor (Hello, American History X? Wowza. And Fight Club? Loved it!), but C'MON!

Oh yeah, and in my interweb research for why the heck this is happening, I came across the movie's release date. It's set for June 13th. Which is a Friday. Which is also my birthday. Which means this year I'll get to hear all kinds of "Ooooh, scary!" and "Bummer - that's bad luck!" comments. Which is annoying.

But I will not care, as I will be certain to request the day off to create a lil' three day birthday weekend for myself. Though that'll simply be a 72-hour period of focused celebratory behavior, because I fully believe in spending the whole of June to revel in birthday funtivities.

Oooh, look at all the bright colors!

Just finished watching Across the Universe...and am happy to report that I was pleasantly surprised by how much I enjoyed it. As I've mentioned before, I'm no fan of musicals - but I've seen three during this year's Oscar Season prep (Sweeney Todd, Once and Across the Universe) that are working hard on changin' my mind. It prolly helps that all three were a bit non-traditional. Across the Universe was the only one that really had the Hollywood ending kinda deal.

The movie features a love story inspired by songs within the Beatles' songbook, set in the 1960s amid anti-war protests, Vietnam and various psychedelia. I enjoyed watching the threads of the story weave together, all set to songs written by the Beatles over the course of a few decades. And the sets were pretty cool as well - so many pretty colors! The movie's up for the Oscar for Achievement in Costume Design, but with Atonement and Sweeney Todd in that category, I don't think the flick's got too great a shot at a Golden Mister. I must say, I really enjoyed the cameo by Eddie Izzard. He's fun in just about anything he's in. Forget the cowbell - MORE IZZARD is what I'd like to see.

Super Sunday

We enjoyed the 2008 Superbowl at Faith and Alex's this year. Everyone brought snackies to share, and we all managed to fit into the living room to watch the game. At half-time, a few of us bailed to the basement and rocked a few foosball games. I officially suu-hucked at the beginning, but with uber-awesome foosball player Alex by my side, I managed to pick up my game a bit and score a few goals, propelling our team to victory. Good times.

Belmont 2000 lets Jason have a corner of the couch

Rawls and Kate celebrate the Giants' victory

Leah consoles Ryan on the Patriots' loss

Pretty cocktails

On Saturday afternoon, the movie chicks and I journeyed downtown to catch The Savages at Fox Tower. We arrived early and repaired to Dragonfish for pre-movie cocktails and snackies. I enjoyed the guava mai tai shown here - so yummy! We noted that the happy hour menu is quite extensive, and I think I'm going to have to try out the dim sum buffet deal at some point.

Faith's Birthday

Faith's location of choice for this year's fancy birthday dinner was RingSide Steakhouse. We had the table in front of the fireplace and enjoyed fantastic steaks and excellent service! Jason and I joined Faith, Alex, Grady and Sarah downtown after work on Friday. We were a bit late to arrive, as Alex pointed out, "traffic must have been tough in Yachats." He likes to make his little jokes about us living so far west it's practically the coast. Such a funny one he is!